Sunday, September 1, 2013

What Not to Do Around Me When I'm Reading

My friend dragged me to some social place, so I was doing my usual thing and was curled up in a corner with an amazing book when people begin to interupt me. This is what you should never do when you're near an Alisa with a book.

1.  Try and involve me in an intense philosophical debate about homosexual rights. They should be able to do whatever and whomever they want. End of discussion. Go away now.

2. Eat annoyingly loud food items around me. These include: chips, cookies,candy, Asian food, Mexican food, European food, African food, Australian food, Antarctic food, American food, gum, or anything slightly edible. Get it away from the book.

3. Walk very slowly in front of me. I'm reading a book. I don't want to be distracted by someone's footsteps.

4. Tell me to be more "social". Don't even try.

5. Talk on your phone. No. I don't care who broke up with whom.

6. Try and engage a conversation with me. This will result in my amazingly terrifying glare and you slowly backing up.

7. Talk with anyone.

8. Bumping into me and claiming you don't see me. I've been in the same place for at least an hour. It's not a shock if you've already passed me twice.

9.  Laugh.

10. Whistle.

11.  Walk a pet near me.

12. Blink.

13. Crack your neck.

14. Look at me.

15.  Move

16.  Breathe.

I don't see how hard this is...

Well, maybe a little. And people wonder why I'm always in my room.

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